• Discover how the smallest choices in tone or actions can leave the biggest mark on your reputation as a leader.
• Learn how your emotional intelligence shapes how others see you.
• Uncover the three stress response types and what they say about you.
Recently, CEOs have been showing up in the headlines for reasons that have nothing to do with performance.
From the one who thought it was acceptable to snatch a tennis cap out of a child's hands (who picks a fight with a kid?) to another who gained infamy at a Coldplay concert, it is clear that leaders are being judged by their behaviour outside the boardroom as much as within it.
Of course, leaders are human. We all give in to ego, impatience, and occasionally worse. But it's those small moments - the tiny choices you make every day - that tell the world who you are. How you word an email, or whether you remember the receptionist's name are the things that people remember about you.
The Worst Way to Create an Unforgettable Password
People still talk about the way Jonah Peretti, CEO of BuzzFeed, handled layoffs at HuffPost in March 2021. BuzzFeed had only just acquired the publication, and within weeks, 47 staff were told their jobs were gone.
The moment is remembered less for the financial reasons behind the decision and more for how little emotional intelligence was shown in delivering it. Staff had to log into a Zoom call with the password "Spr!ngisH3r3." On the surface it meant "spring is here,". Against the backdrop of unexpected layoffs after a long pandemic, it came across as tone deaf and even cruel.
Some only realised they had lost their jobs when no email arrived in their inbox later that day. What stayed with people was not just the news, but the way it was handled. The impersonal process made the pain of the decision much worse. It is a reminder that your emotional intelligence shapes how people remember you in the moment.
Trust Is Built In the Micro-Moments
Whether we are conscious of it or not, many of us measure someone's character by the little things. Think about the leaders you have admired. Is it only their results that impressed you, or was it how they showed up?
Do they listen when you speak, or are they checking their phone? Do they follow through when they say they will? Do they treat everyone with respect, no matter their title? These details matter because they add up. They tell people whether you can be trusted.
The small things create the culture. If you dismiss them, others will too. If you pay attention to them, you set a standard that people will follow.
From years of coaching CFOs and senior leaders, I see three common ways leaders approach small moments of conflict.
The Deflector
This leader shifts the spotlight elsewhere. They blame the system, the team, or external forces. People see through it and it drains their respect.
The Absorber
This leader takes everything on themselves. They shoulder the blame. On the surface, they appear strong, but underneath, resentment is building and it eventually shows up in how they lead.
The Calibrator
This leader rises to the moment and responds with perspective. They own their part and after making amends, are careful to use the opportunity to reset the tone. They often use the experience to reinforce the culture they want to build.
Of course we all fall into each of these categories at different times. The challenge is to notice which one you are leaning towards and aim to spend more time in the Calibrator space. This is the sweet spot where issues become opportunities to strengthen rather than weaken your influence.
How To Recover
The Takeaway
Reputations are built in the margins. Anyone can prepare for the big presentation, but the leaders who inspire trust are those who bring the same attention and respect to the everyday. Small things matter because they reveal who you really are.
How have you noticed this play out in your workplace?
Have you ever drawn big conclusions about a colleague's character based on something small?
I'd love to hear your thoughts.
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